11/30/2006

Be Cool

I'm pretty sure I'm in bad mood at this moment. I guess I am mad at myself…I’ve been suffering from insomnia in recent, mostly because I'm really anxious to get back onto a normal work/sleep cycle…

I just checked Brendan’s Chinese blog , which made me to resist the urge to leave a rude comment in reply to the stupid ones. I’m so sick of some people saying things like “Chinese culture ‘have extensive knowledge and profound scholarship’, you can't even begin to understand it as a foreigner�. There’s no doubt about Chinese culture is really cool, but I doubt if those ignorant arrogant commenters can understand a bit of it or try to study. So sometimes I left comments on his blog to teach them a lesson – I am not intelligent, but I believe in this case it’s just about common sense.

Reading wuxia novels and having a bad memory for years, generally, I use three ways to fight: 1) slash throat directly – their own stupidity guarantees that there'll be holes in their argument; 2) kill in a bloodless way – convincing but mean; 3) pitting one burst of strength against another – quote from some respectable author or the author they mentioned, like Lu Xun. All above requests to be written in the classical literary style, at least, sounds elegant, but mean!!

Just now, I was just going to say: “Hey, why don’t you fuck off, dipshit?� It’s bad to be lazy and moody, so I didn’t say that…Maybe someday I will, when I am really want to be lazy and moody to some people annoy me so much.

Now I feel sleepy...

11/16/2006

�寂寞而求音

(Nagging works. Luckily, I have a warehouse full of old pieces. Snowball used to dream about being Picasso's mistress (and mistress of the Italian director Pier Paolo Pasolini if he was not gay), the way I used to dream about being Cezanne's wife (and wife of the Russian director Andrei Tarkovsky), so it's easy to tell who loves art more - me me meï¼?)

å?³ä½¿å¡žå°šæ›¾æ?¶æ?„高更“他拿我一点å°?å°?å?‘现到处去宣扬â€?,甚至讽刺梵高的作å“?ä¸?过是疯å­?画的,两ä½?大师也å?ªå¾—噤声,说这è¯?的是大师中的大师,奈何ä¸?得,至少没有几个人能在寂寂无å??æ—¶ä»?充满这样的果决:“åƒ?我这样的画家,æ¯?隔一个世纪æ‰?会出现一人â€?,åƒ?个诺言,说到å?šåˆ°ã€‚

我是在大学的一次户外写生å?Žå?‘现塞尚的,这之å‰?他于我ä¸?过是一群“大师â€?中的一ä½?,哪怕背负ç?€â€œçŽ°ä»£ç»˜ç”»ä¹‹çˆ¶â€?之å??;直到我也从自然界走进走出,é‡?新翻看列ä½?的画作时,塞尚便以其并ä¸?夺目的相貌ä¸?知怎么回事地走进你的视线,æ?¥äº†å°±ä¸?走了。 喜欢他的风景,画了两百é??的景致;他的夫人,似乎被丈夫折腾得已没了脾气的女人;也喜欢那å?ªæœ‰å¯¥å¯¥æ•°ç¬”还留有大多空白的作å“?,毕加索å?£ä¸­çš„“å?ªæœ‰ä¸€ç¬”,便全都有了â€?,觉得他的画“沉â€?,“拙â€?,存心有æ„?æ— æ„?之妙,笔触也是生活的颤音,我ä¸?知如何表述,å?´å?ˆä¸?å¾—ä¸?说,无法将心曲简å?•地æ?Ÿä¹‹é«˜é˜?,因为哪里都找ä¸?到替代。

塞尚�个�士,尽管也有几分�阮�,��过是�一�入世,但他确是在远离�当时的中�力�们而无视于惠而�实的掌声,�求闻达地在创作中孜孜以求,�磨�属于他视线里的文章,探索真实,颇有冷眼觑破世情的味�,��有很多画家也因他,便有了“但窥��,转眼�境皆空�。

我但愿能因自己的喜爱的是塞尚使得自己在画艺上å?¯æ??高的一筹å?Šç­¹ï¼Œæˆ‘努力ç?€ï¼Œä½†è¿™ä¼¼ä¹Žå?¯é?‡ä¸?å?¯æ±‚,å?¯æ±‚çš„å?´æ˜¯ä¸€ä»½æ€?度,晋代文人陆机在“文赋â€?中说:“课虚无以责有,å?©å¯‚寞而求音â€?,塞尚是这样的,所以有了他的ä¸?朽,我虽ä¸?想ä¸?朽,但也想这样,这令人è¸?实。